Just because we ended up unschooling doesn't mean that the kids never do the three R's. I can tell that people assume that they never do lessons of any kind and this is a misconception. They do what they ask for. And "YES" they ask for math and they ask for reading lessons AND they print in their play all the time. I know it is hard for some people to grasp this idea. We see kids who are told when and how to learn each day in school and those kids usually don't want to do more of the three R's at home. In fact they need to be forced by the parents laying down the rules about homework. By telling my kids when and where to learn something I always felt like I was insulting their intelligence and possibly affecting their confidence in their own ability to choose and learn the best way they know how.
Since I've let go of my own impulse to "control" I've seen such a transformation in us all. There is so much less pressure. I don't mean just for the kids but the pressure has been lifted from us parents as well. Life feels so much more free and flowing now. The kids seem to grasp information so fast compared to when I would try and sit them down to do something. Everyone seems happier and we are all learning so much.
I hate that articles and news casts misrepresent unschoolers. I think because we are all so conditioned in our society about how school is or how we have to learn through being taught it makes it hard to understand. I also think this idea of having to be taught is conditioned into us because if we truly believe this we will pay for teachers and that means money for someone else. I could go into this deeper here but I won't. Suffice to say that it wasn't always this way though out history and people did great things in the past without having to pay an ivy league school to teach them. The strange thing is that now that I see how life is for all of us to learn what we want (parents included) I wonder how I never saw it before.
I am adding an after-thought here: I believe that as long as they aren't in the system of school or forced to be taught subjects that they will ask for those subjects (even CRAVE those subjects) or be willing to learn it without having it scheduled and forced upon them. BUT (big BUT), if there comes a time that I feel that they really will need something I know that there are more appropriate ways to have them learn what they need in fun and engaging ways without extinguishing their enthusiasm for learning. This is exactly what I witnessed from Austyn when I would sit him down on a schedule and teach to him. His enthusiasm died right off. I have learned to respect and trust his ability to seek out what he needs to learn and what he will learn well in each moment of everyday and I'm making sure that he is getting what he craves.
